As we grow and gain, we are offered the blessing of wisdom and the gift of knowing ourselves and our value--rather than desperately trying to prove it, as happens in youth.
But growing is also very much about letting go; losing. As we grow larger in years we leave behind young bodies that can bounce back from abuse easily, small children who crave our snuggles and story reading, the bliss of bike riding or rollerskating for no reason but freedom, and with no appointments but suppertime.
Growing older means missing not-so-concrete things like who we were before we decided who we were going to be, while also missing stuff like hippies, Drive-in-Theaters, and video stores.
As we grow older I believe it's important to do our missing gracefully. Letting go of our youth, our children's youth, the toys and cultures we grew-up with, shouldn't be about sadness or loss so much as a continuously nourishing memory.
We will miss our children's tiny hands in our own. And we'll miss our ability to dance all night. And we'll miss the way flying in an airplane used to be an experience that amazed and impressed. That's part of growing older, and if we don't do it gracefully we hold ourselves and others back.
This new year I plan to miss things gracefully! My sons will go and grow, and I will happily allow it.
The healthiest way--I find--to let go, is to choose action. It's hard to miss gracefully when we don't choose an action in response. So I will also go and grow!! While my sons choose action, while they find ways to need me and others less, I will find ways to need them and others less. What better way could there be to example independence than to seek it?
Each new year (each new moment, truthfully. But we're playing the New Year game!) offers new things to miss, and new actions to take.
Regardless of the specifics, I wish you the comfort of missing gracefully, and the thrill of choosing action in the New Year!!
Happy New Year my supportive, positive, action oriented friends!!!
Hugs, smiles, and love!!
Autism Answers
Happy New Year! From my family to yours!!! |