|My youngest son and I.|
While driving with my youngest son this morning to drop him off at high school (lordy, they're growing up!!) I started asking him about two of the classes he has this year that he was nervous about.
"Don't," he interrupted. "Don't. When you talk about school I get this nervous burn in the pit of my stomach. I know that you care about my day and stuff but right now, just don't. I need your distracting conversation until I've been going to school a little longer and I'm not so nervous. Don't worry though, I got this."
We moms and dads and sisters and aunts and grandpas want so freaking badly to crawl inside of our loved one's heads and build "healthy, happy, confident" pathways and blanket forts. So, sometimes we (okay, I know I do this but I'm gonna assume some of y'all do it too) try talking and telling and attacking them with the tools and ideas and lessons we hope will build that healthy confident blanket fort in their hearts and heads.
But our loved one's truly have to build their own unique healthy happy confident blanket forts. If we throw tools and blueprints at them without giving them time to figure out who they are and what style of healthy happy confident blanket fort suits them best, we'll just make a big messy pile of stuff.
We need to stand back and show them that we believe in them. That we want (desperately!) to share our tools and materials, but that we're also excited to see what tools and materials they discover on their own. What shape and colors their healthy happy confident blanket fort will have.
A cool thing about these healthy happy confident blanket forts that we build in our hearts and heads is this: they are not made out of immovable cement or brick. We can change and rearrange and forever share our materials and ideas while we forever discover and invent more!
Of course, I didn't tell my son all of this. We were busy having fun talking about the way a Mango Madness flavored Snapple hits the spot after a hard day of Marching Band practice in the Texas heat.
So now I know. Mango Madness, Jason Derulo, and Marching Band are in his healthy happy confident blanket fort. Good for him. I've got coffee, Dr. Hook, and writing in mine.
We're different, and that's good.
He's got this!!
Hugs, smiles, and love!!!!
Autism Answers with Tsara Shelton (Facebook)
Straight outta his healthy happy confident blanket fort!