Friday, November 8, 2013
Autism Answer: Judgments Sneak In...
I was waking Shay up for school this morning and sang,"Get up my gorgeous Shay! Handsome, snuggly, Shay! Get up, get up, get up!"
He stretched his huge fifteen year old body and sort of sing-songed back,"You're the gorgeous one mom. Gorgeous, snuggly, mom."
And here's my Oops.... I replied with,"I'm not gorgeous, I'm an old lady with a mustache!"
I was just trying to be silly and fun. We parents know all too well that how we wake up our house in the mornings often affects the mood of the day. I like to lead with silly and fun. But I quickly realized my mistake and retracted the statement.
"Actually, age is beautiful and my mustache is fun. So I changed my mind. Thank-you Shay! I guess we're all gorgeous!!"
In the back of my mind I could remember all of the times I had playfully countered their compliments with silly jokes about my age, goat hairs, and muffin top. Well, no more!
I'm in the position to teach these boys all about real, true beauty. And I'm not planning on screwing that up!!
Luckily, Shay and I had a good giggle and comfortable conversation about it. And I'm pretty sure we won't be making that mistake again.
Judgments have a way of sneaking in. I think it's alright, as long as we keep a watchful eye out for them and then share with our loved ones what we've learned.
There is a beautiful willingness to not judge ourselves harshly that we can example there.
There is a lovely moment for forgiving the judgments of others while offering insights that we can example when revealing our own mistakes and making change.
I really like that!
Hugs, smiles, and love!!!