Did you eat your meat?
If YES: you can have pudding.
If NO: You cannot have any pudding
_________________________
There is nothing funny about not having any pudding if you did not eat your meat, And yet, if I am remembering correctly, the first time I laughed out loud at a joke online, it was that one.
It’s hilarious!!
Simple, short, and not age restricted. Well, except you have to get the reference, and Pink Floyd is sort of an older person reference.
Which brings me to the point of this post: I am old. Errrrr…. wait, that’s not supposed to be the point…. What did I come into this room for again?
Oh, ya! I meant for my point to be this: humour is only funny when you get the joke. Heck, humour isn’t even humour in the United States. There it is something called “humor”. Entirely unique to that part of the world. Well, except that the Internet has made all grammar and spelling and slang and word usage sort of shared? So humour and humor can be known for what they are: different ways to say the same thing.
Which reminds me: This morning I sprayed my mouth with Axe body spray. Now, I talk with an Axe scent.
Hilarious, right!? (Also, entirely false. I do not speak with either an Axe Scent or an accent. I am a simple girl with coffee breath who talks normal. Accents are from other places.)
These jokes are only funny if you get them. (Not my jokes, those ones are funny inherently. If you don’t get them, try again.) And to “get” a joke you don’t usually have to be smart, you usually have to be in touch with the culture the jokes are commenting on.
If you have not heard Pink Floyd’s THE WALL, or more specifically Another Brick In The Wall Part 2, then a) you are maybe deaf, at which point I can’t help but wonder if you know the song? I’m quite curious about that actually! How popular is popular music in the deaf community? b) you might be young, because it is a song from an album that was released over three decades ago which does not make it any less awesome just less often talked about. If you do not know the song, then you may see the image above and think it is simply instructions someone left on their fridge. Did you eat your meat? No? Then no pudding for you. Fair rule I think, though for my children I may have asked did you eat your protein, since I am not a big meat eater.
But I digress. Often. My best friend and I call it going on rabbit trails, which we find a cute way to say walking down an entirely different narrative path than originally intended, taking us a bit off the point we were originally trying to make. Or, as I said, digressing.
So, yes. I digress. The point is: If you have not heard Pink Floyd’s Another Brick In The Wall Part 2, specifically the part where we hear “If you don't eat your meat, you can't have any pudding. How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat?” then the joke will not be a joke, it will not be funny.
If you live in a place or time where Axe body spray, and all its comical ads, do not exist then the pun I shared will not be funny.
This is why comedy, humour, jokes, silliness, are all so gosh darned important. Laughter is healthy, joy is delightful, laughing together with friends and strangers alike is a spectacular way to build community and connections. Brotherhood and bonds.
But it is vitally valuable to pay attention to what we laugh at, what we “get” and why.
A blond is lost in the desert, scorching heat beating down on her from above, no water or shade anywhere to be seen. Suddenly, a genie appears. “I can grant you one wish,” he booms with authority. “Oh, thank goodness!” The blond is overwhelmed with relief. “Can I have a car door?” She asks. “Um, okay,” the genie says, confused but granting the wish as is his nature. Yet, he can’t help following up with a question, “Of all the things you could wish for, why a car door?” “It’s obvious, silly!” She explains, as if to a child, “It’s so hot out here I wanted to open the car window.”
This is mostly funny. It helps if you "get" it, if you know there is a dumb blond stereotype, but it is also kind of funny if you don’t know about the stereotype as it can easily be inferred. I think, personally, it’s okay to laugh at these jokes because blonds are too pretty and need to be taken down a peg or two. Errrr…. wait, did I say that out loud? I mean, because it is common knowledge that blonds are not dumb. But, I suspect, it wasn’t always common knowledge. I suspect blonds were seen as sex kittens and man eaters and more, which led to jokes built to frame them in an unattractive light.
There is so much power in paying attention to what we laugh about, to what our peers laugh about, and to what our culture laughs about. So much power. This does not mean we stifle or attack people and their jokes, no. This means we are aware of, conversational about, and intentional in the comedic space. Don’t laugh if you don’t find it funny. Talk about why. Don’t give too much attention to the stuff that feels cruel or dangerous, though do be willing to share the hows and whys of your feelings.
When I was fourteen my boyfriend used to say, “I wouldn’t kick her out of bed,” when attractive girls walked by. Some of his friends would laugh, as would I. Some of his friends did not laugh, and even called him out. “Your girlfriend is right there, man,” a friend of his once said. “It’s okay,” I said joyfully, “it’s funny!” “She’s cool, she’s not a prude,” my boyfriend would say. And I would be proud.
I was proud because he thought I was cool. But also because I’d hid my real feelings well. It HAD hurt me, every freaking time, and I was embarrassed about that. Embarrassed that I was such a weak needy girl that my feelings would be hurt by a joke.
Of course now I see it differently. It had been a cruel joke. Mainly because he would have hit me had I said something similar about a guy walking by. He would not have thought that was funny. But after he made the joke a few times and I did not ask him not to, well, it wasn’t really cruel anymore, was it? I told him I thought it was funny.
Please don’t misunderstand me: there are many relationships where such a comment would be fine. Though I will go out on a limb and wager that most girlfriends laughing and saying they don’t mind are lying, I will also admit that lots of girlfriends don’t mind. Lots also want to invite her into bed. Lots of boyfriends don’t mind when their girlfriend makes such jokes, and they would like to invite other guys into their bed. Or hear about her sleeping with him behind his back, which is a kink for many people. Or simply girlfriends and boyfriends who have no feelings about the joke and think of it as only a joke. The point is: I had a boyfriend when I was fourteen.
Additional point: We are living in a time when we have easier than ever access to cultures different from our own, to diverse comedy streams and memes, to the funny bones of previously elusive or silenced communities. How wonderful! Let's learn what others are laughing about and why.
Humour is a great place for recognizing who we are as an individual, a family, a country, a world. Seriously, it is. Seriously, it is the most fun way to get serious.
However, we must be careful not to censor humour so much, but instead investigate it. If you are inclined, laugh freely and loudly and with great guffaws!
But also notice.
Why is it funny? Should it be funny?
Just another brick isn’t such a big deal. But all the bricks? Eventually our bricks build, well, a wall.
What I’m saying is: go ahead and laugh, but take the time to notice and reflect. Wonder what it means to find something funny. Do the work.
After all, if you don’t eat your meat, you can’t have any pudding.
Happy New Year, friends!!
Laugh well!!!
