My youngest brother (who just turned 28... man, that makes me old!!) has a problem remembering to notice other people. He's a good driver and pays close attention to all of the other cars on the road, but when it comes to using that skill outside of his vehicle, he's challenged! He has a habit of not holding the door for someone right behind him, stepping in-front of people in line or standing a little too close.
However, having been his sister for most of his life (my mom adopted him when he was barely over a year) I've learned some simple tricks to helping him out. I've learned to be concrete and clear, and to give him a specific action rather than obscure or ambiguous thoughts and observations. Well... I've learned because my mom told me. But still! tee hee!
Of course, one reason I am so happy to help him in this way is because he's proven over and over and over, that he wants to learn, can learn and will happily take my ideas and turn them into something more his style, but equally useful!
The other day I told him that for the next few months, every time he goes to a check-out counter he should look around first for someone he can offer the front of the line to. I told him to make that a new habit.
Yesterday the young lady who works at our local Dollar General smiled at me and asked,"What's up with your brother? He's been so pleasant and friendly lately! He looks so happy. Has he gotten a new job or something?" Sweet!! Love it!!
Regardless of who I'm giving tips to: myself, my kids, my hubby, my brothers, the gazillions of teens that show up to chat with me every time they see my van... I remind myself not to shrug and just offer up an excuse like 'that's just who I am' or 'kids will be kids'... but rather to believe that the skill can be learned, and then try stuff!!
Hugs, smiles and love!!!
However, having been his sister for most of his life (my mom adopted him when he was barely over a year) I've learned some simple tricks to helping him out. I've learned to be concrete and clear, and to give him a specific action rather than obscure or ambiguous thoughts and observations. Well... I've learned because my mom told me. But still! tee hee!
Of course, one reason I am so happy to help him in this way is because he's proven over and over and over, that he wants to learn, can learn and will happily take my ideas and turn them into something more his style, but equally useful!
The other day I told him that for the next few months, every time he goes to a check-out counter he should look around first for someone he can offer the front of the line to. I told him to make that a new habit.
Yesterday the young lady who works at our local Dollar General smiled at me and asked,"What's up with your brother? He's been so pleasant and friendly lately! He looks so happy. Has he gotten a new job or something?" Sweet!! Love it!!
Regardless of who I'm giving tips to: myself, my kids, my hubby, my brothers, the gazillions of teens that show up to chat with me every time they see my van... I remind myself not to shrug and just offer up an excuse like 'that's just who I am' or 'kids will be kids'... but rather to believe that the skill can be learned, and then try stuff!!
Hugs, smiles and love!!!
My youngest brother, Rye! Don't be surprised if he remembers to hold the door open for ya! |