Autism Answer: A Series of Choices

MY SON: My thoughts are confusing me today. I don't know how to feel about them. It's a little bit sad I think. 

ME: (busy working and only half listening) Hmmmmm.... how do you feel about that?

MY SON: Seriously? I just told you I don't know how I feel. 

ME: Hmmmm... I see. Have you brushed your teeth today?

MY SON: Seriously?

My son leaves the room and I make a mental note to listen better. You know, after I'm finished with the work I'm working on. Then a moment later my son returns wearing shoes.

MY SON: I think I'll go see if dad needs some help outside. 

ME: (turning away from my computer so I'll actually be present) That's a good idea. You're such a nice guy! And smart too!

MY SON: Not really. I just want to do something to forget about my thoughts being confusing. 

ME: Ya, I know. And you chose going outside to offer your dad a helping hand. You chose doing something useful and physical. That's nice and smart! Don't devalue your choices just because you felt compelled to make them. Those are still nice and smart choices that you chose to make!

MY SON: (smiling and opening the door, speaking up over the sound of my husband's outside tools) You're weird mom! I love you! 

I watched him head out the door and turned back to my computer. I almost felt bad for having been distracted when he first came to talk to me. But then I realized that had I not been distracted he may not have chosen to step outside and help his dad. So, I chose not to feel bad!

Huh! Neat!

"Life is a series of choices." Lynette Louise aka The Brain Broad

Smart woman!

Hugs, smiles, and love!!
Autism Answers with Tsara Shelton (Facebook)

My son working outside with his dad. Good choice!

Autism Answer: Just 'cause it looks "Wrong", doesn't mean that it is!

I was on the back porch feeding our dogs when our "Alpha" girl came running around the corner, a dead baby rabbit flopping unnaturally in her mouth. 

I cringed and twitched and cried out,"Gross!" 

Upon realizing that she was about to be doubly fed, she quickly swallowed her organic, free-range meat (in--like--three gulps!) and pranced up to me, happy as can be.

I'll be honest. I wanted to yell at her. I wanted to tell her she was bad and disgusting. I pulled back when she tried to get my affection. But I knew full well that she hadn't done anything wrong.

In truth, she is a fabulous survivor. She's independent and a wonderful protector. A loyal family member that we adore. 

But for the next few hours, she kinda grossed me out.

It's not the first time I've had to get over her ability to catch, kill, and eat. And this time, just like all of the others, I was back to being affectionate and comfortable around her shortly. It happens quicker and quicker each time.

If I react like that when I know it's not wrong, I gotta remember to keep an eye on myself when I automatically think something is wrong.

Sometimes, it is wrong.

Most often though, it's just something I'm not used to, or it's something I don't like. That doesn't make it wrong.

I've seen people I love make others uncomfortable and cringe when they did things that were different, kinda creepy or downright crazy. But rarely were those things in any way wrong.

And when they were, it was hard for the people I love to see why, or take it serious, considering they had been told over and over for reasons that made no true sense, that so many things were wrong.

Rule of Thumb: Just because something seems wrong, doesn't mean that it is. Take a moment to reflect, discuss and decide.

Hugs, smiles and love!!!
Autism Answers

Our dogs: Deja & December
The itty bitty one is December, and she is now waaayyy bigger!
But Deja is still the boss!
Our Alpha lady!