Wednesday, October 14, 2015

Autism Answer: Take Advantage of a Quiet Mind to Hear Whispering Ideas (Tips to Beat Writer's Block & Parenting Block)

This is what it looks like to be busily beating Writer's Block. Not too shabby!

There was a reporter looking for writers who would share a tip for beating Writer's Block. She then wanted us to show how that tip could be transferred to writing wedding vows. I thought that was neat! So, I shared my tip. 

Then I thought it might be neat to share here with you, and transfer my tip, instead, to parenting. Because, you know, I like making everything about parenting!! 

So, my perseveration with parenting becomes your tip for beating Writer's Block and Parenting Block. (Feel free to roll your eyes at my obvious attempt to plant the 'perseverations are motivators and can be useful' seed. tee hee!) 

Tip 1  
How I beat writer's block:
I used to fear Writer's Block and that fear would paralyze me. It would make a home in my skull and point out all the obvious reasons that anything I had once upon a time written was merely fluke, and not nearly as good as I thought it was in the first place. But, I no longer fear it. Actually, today I embrace Writer's Block.

I get my writing energy from the mood that moves over me while I'm writing, but I get my ideas from the life I live when I'm not writing. So during those times that I find myself stumped by Writer's Block I take advantage of my quiet mind; I listen to and feel the ideas around me. When a feeling or idea starts an internal monologue, I just start writing, trusting that the mood will move over me.

It always does!

Tip 2  
Using This Tip for Parenting Block:
Quick Definition of Parenting Block - When you want to help your child feel happier or learn a skill or move forward but you feel like you've tried everything and you think you have no more ideas or creative solutions.

Don't fear Parenting Block, don't fear that you're not going to think of something helpful or impressively creative or pertinent to your child's situation. Fear hinders us in most things, especially parenting (and writing). 

Instead, trust that the mood will move over you; but listen actively to the ideas around you. Listen to the idea you get when you notice how often your daughter picks at her toes, feel the creative motivators that tickle your inner monologue when you hear your son repeat the same phrases or sounds that sooth him, wonder why the toe picking and sound repeating is a consistent habit for your loved one and listen when they show you, tell you, give you clues. Too often we are so busy parenting that we forget to slow down, follow, listen, and learn. 

Sometimes Parenting Block is our best Parenting Tool. 

When you are out of ideas, relax and listen. Don't fear that the ideas won't come, they will! And they will come easier when you get fear out of the way. 

Hear those whispers of ideas, listen to them, and then just start parenting. Trust the mood to move over you, allow it to meander (you can tweak the idea later) and know that parenting is only a little bit smart ideas and creative solutions. Mostly, it's you loving your child, learning with him, listening to her, and saying what you feel. 

So, turn up the volume on those whispering ideas, and parent from the place where you feel. 

Bonus Tip: 
Writer's Block & Parenting Block 
When all else fails, fall back on an old favorite. A thing you and your children love. Dancing, singing, walking, movie watching, building, cooking, wrestling, driving, reading. But do it with the intention for newness. Listen different and see different. Often our greatest moments come when we revisit an old favorite with new eyes and ears. 

This works for both writing and parenting!! 

Hugs, smiles, and love!!!
Autism Answers with Tsara Shelton (Facebook) 

My oldest son, beating Writer's Block with an idea I gave him after my own Parenting Block.