Friday, May 16, 2014

Autism Answer: A Big Supportive Family

Last night my baby brother showed up just to chat. Rye's twenty-eight years old, but he'll always be my baby brother! 

Anyway, my boys had fallen asleep early so it was just me and Rye, hanging out in the quiet while the sun went down. 

Before my brother'd driven up to our house I had been waiting for my hubby to come by and bring me our car. But since Rye was at the house I called my husband and told him to just wait where he was, Rye could drive me to him.

So my brother climbed into his car and reached over to clean the passenger seat for me. What a gentleman! Then he proceeded to drive--in my slow poke opinion--too fast down our country road. Being the oldest of eight kids I was quite comfortable telling my brother to slow down, to turn his headlights on, to wait longer before crossing the train tracks.... 

Okay, I'll say it, I'm a chronic back seat driver!

Rye looked at me and smiled with confidence. "I'm not going to have an accident, Tsara. You can relax and enjoy the ride."

We laughed as I explained,"Hey now! I've been telling you and all of our brothers and sisters what to do for years, it's my job as the oldest. Don't take that away from me, I won't know who to be!"

He took the corner onto the highway (a little fast) and then looked over at me and said,"I keep thinking about how lucky I am to have such a big supportive family. It's hard to make friends, especially friends that will accept you, but I always have my family. Not everybody has that."

My brother looked over at me and smiled. My heart was so happy I almost didn't mind that he was looking at me and not the road while we were coming up to a stop sign that--in my overly aware opinion--he should have already been slowing down for.

We may not be able to force the world to be accepting and understanding of us or our loved ones right this instant, but we can show the world and our loved ones what we expect by doing it ourselves. This instant.

You can be a big supportive family. Even if there's only two of you, you can. Because being supportive and accepting is big, and it's so beautiful and fun that you will likely grow in numbers.

The true reason my baby brother (who was supposedly never going to be able to take care of himself and would need helpers and drugs and institutions) could do me the favor of driving me to my car while he was headed to his own apartment in town, is our big supportive family.

And the true reason we have a big supportive family is because mom said we had to, and she believed we could. 

So go ahead! Believe in it and insist on it! There is no therapy in this world that'll dwarf the power of a big supportive family. I'm sure of it!

And don't forget to come to a complete stop and wait three seconds before crossing the train tracks. tee hee!

Hugs, smiles, and love!!!

Autism Answers with Tsara Shelton (Facebook)

My baby brother, Rye
standing by his chariot!