Autism Answer: World Autism Awareness Day with The Brain Broad - Bringing Us A Way To Learn & Connect With The World from Home

Quarantined and staying home, sheltering in place, not working or working with anxiety, the world is undoubtedly in a state of change. It is going to wake up different.

In the meantime, people like my mom, Dr. Lynette Louise (aka The Brain Broad), people who build their lives and livings out of helping others, are finding creative and powerful ways to reach out to their communities.

Today is World Autism Awareness Day. It is also my mom's birthday. And she has found a safe and wonderful way to celebrate it with you, me, and all our friends!

FIX IT IN FIVE with LYNETTE LOUISE aka THE BRAIN BROAD is her international docu-series, airing on The Autism Channel, highlighting and helping five different families, over the course of five days, in five different countries. Until now seasons one and two (Uganda and USA respectively) were only available to view for anyone with The Autism Channel or available to rent/own via Vimeo on Demand.

However, today she is releasing all five episodes of season one on YouTube. Fall in love with Milly, a single mom in Uganda, and her autistic daughter, Trisca! Get to know them, their unique challenges and brave willingness to learn on camera. Follow Lynette as she teaches and gives tools, learns and reaches out for support, nibbles on grasshoppers. 

Invite the family into your home as they have invited us into theirs. Let's connect and learn and love together in this way! Yes, we are connected to everyone in this world and sometimes it is dangerous. But most of the time, when done with intention and acceptance and understanding, it is life enhancing and beautiful.

A great gift to you this World Autism Awareness Day, and a great gift to The Brain Broad on her birthday, is taking advantage of her offer: Watch FIX IT IN FIVE with THE BRAIN BROAD. Share it with your family and friends and watch it together while separated. Contact each other to discuss your favorite moments and lessons, and continue on to the next episode.

The world is going to wake up different. We can wait and see in what ways, or we can choose to do our part to shape it inclusively and sustainably.

For my mom's birthday I hope you'll join us in doing the latter.

However you choose to spend your time, I'm sending you love and virtual hugs this World Autism Awareness Day!!!

Hugs, smiles, and love!!!! 

Autism Answers with Tsara Shelton (Facebook)

Here are the Playlists on her YouTube Channel. https://www.youtube.com/user/lynettellouisel/playlists

 

While you're there, be sure to check out the ABCs of autism playlist. So far we are up to the letter C and all three short videos are freaking FANTASTIC!!!!! 

 

And here is Episode one from Uganda - 

FIX IT IN FIVE with THE BRAIN BROAD

 

 

Autism Answer: Playing My Role This Autism Awareness Month

Happy April, friends!!

Tonight is my youngest son's junior prom, tomorrow is my mom's 60th birthday and world autism awareness day, and this entire month is all about bringing answers, ideas, insights, and experiences from the world of autism to the larger public. 

My youngest son didn't make eye contact for years, struggled seriously with sensory issues, and still works hard to handle his social strangenesses and misunderstandings. 

My mom spent her childhood seeing sound as color, perseverating over fairness and prejudice, and then adopted several youngsters with similar issues as her own, knowing they could help each other heal. (And they did!)

Both my youngest son and my mom now reach out consistently and creatively to people who are misunderstood, alone, or otherwise hurting from an unbalanced brain.

My mom writes and performs songs that are addictive and lyrically inspiring, she writes articles and books that bring science and personal narrative together in poetic and clever ways, she speaks on stages for audiences that can't help but stand on their feet with emotion, she puts all of her resources and love and knowledge into her international docu-series FIX IT IN FIVE with THE BRAIN BROAD (on The Autism Channel) and she works intimately with families in homes around the world. This, my friends, is only a partial list of the actions she takes to reach out with guidance and understanding.

My son looks up to my mom in beautiful ways and plans one day to join her as a leader, speaker, and performer with a message. 

I don't have any of the skills, history, or insights that those two have but I value, learn from, and honor theirs. 

My work then, every April, is to introduce you to the wonderful life-changing work they do.

So now, I have the pleasure of introducing you to my mom: international autism and mental health expert, gorgeous grandma, and mom extraordinaire! 

Lynette Louise site: www.LynetteLouise.com / Brain & Autism site: www.BrainBody.net

*Truly, an action-oriented way you, your friends, educators, news organizations, and neighbors can take advantage of Autism Awareness Month and my mom would be to rent or purchase one or two seasons (Uganda, USA, respectively) of FIX IT IN FIVE with THE BRAIN BROAD via Vimeo On Demand. Also, it would be the greatest 60th birthday gift you could possibly give my mom!*


SNEAK PEEK OF THIS EVENING: A photo of my son dressed in his prom tux!  

Happy April, friends!! 

I hope you find a similarly fulfilling and fun role to play this Autism Awareness Month!! 

Hugs, smiles, and love!!
Autism Answers with Tsara Shelton (Facebook)

Autism Answer: About Writing

What I love most about writing: 

Those moments when somehow, through struggle and a painful desire to do so, I discover a cadence and the words that say exactly what I'm trying to say.  When I write a sentence or a phrase that brings forth the specific feeling and meaning I'm trying to uncover.  It's like discovering a rare and perfect gem, one you imagined in a dream, on a never-ending length of beach. Except you didn't just discover it; because of your seeking, you are part of it's creation. What a fantastic and addictive feeling! 



Autism Answer: 

My mom is renowned international mental health expert Lynette Louise (aka The Brain Broad). Her journey and unique skills have grown organically from the soil of her unusual mind. As a little girl she was consistently misdiagnosed and considered a brilliant challenge to the grown ups in her world. As a woman she adopted and adored several cognitively challenged children; together they healed and progressed in creative yet consistently authentic to themselves ways. As a woman, she is a powerful passionate advocate and healer. Because I am her daughter, this should have all come pretty naturally and easily to me as well. Right? Well, nope! I pushed her strangeness away and then tried to understand it and then pushed it away again. Until I became a mom myself. It was with mother motivation that I found the ability to nurture what is already there while working my butt of to hone, reveal, and coax it until it shines. It was with writing that understanding filled me even more. It was writing and honing sentences and trimming ideas to their authentic selves that gave me the gift of openly exploring my mom's teachings, customizing them, and making them my very own. 


My biggest dream as a writer: 

Before I actually began writing in public I dreamed of having a shelf full of novels penned by me while I imagined enough of an audience to be considered by the world a real writer. Now, though, my biggest dream has shifted. I was surprised to discover, as I was writing for a possible audience, that being a writer in my own opinion is enough for me, so the audience no longer plays such a significant role in my dream as a writer; although, I adore and imagine them always. My biggest dream now is to have a shelf full of novels that I know are worthy of the stories they tell penned by me. Stories I can honestly say I gave my best service and ability to as a writer. 


Autism Answer:

I watched my mom teach my brothers skills while she nourished and explored their habits and interests. I watched as she celebrated successes that I could hardly see. Until, as a sister, I tried really hard. She didn't seem to be molding them into "normal" people but instead encouraging them to become who they were; while insisting and believing they could gain seemingly impossible-for-them skills along the way. She believed in them and they showed her they could stand on their own, confident in their true selves. As a mom and writer I learned to do this as well. My sons aren't successful only when they make the progression from school to job to living on their own to raising a family to retirement. Nope! They are successful when they are comfortable, confident, and creating their lives in a thoughtful way that matches who they are. Success is kindness and confidence in their true selves. My writing isn't meant to fit into a cookie cutter neighborhood of stories but rather to become what it was meant to be. Still, it is important for me to learn the skills necessary to encourage it stand on it's own. To be confident in it's true self.



What I wish I had known about writing starting out: 

Well, this is one of those questions, isn't it? I mean, I had been told most of the things I wish I knew, but without actually diving in and writing I couldn't quite know them for myself. I was told that writing is not only about the story and not only about the mechanics. But I had to dive into the world of writing myself to truly know the importance of punctuation and format in tandem with story and inspired thought. I was told that every writer writes for different reasons and in different ways, but I had to write for different reasons and in different ways myself before I knew the truth that my way was valid and right; so long as I was writing. Writers  told me the importance of completion; to write and write and write but to, also, come to the end. But it wasn't until I finally finished my first piece of writing (just before my 30th birthday!) that I understood the valuable writing-skill of tying it up and giving it away to the world. Of knowing you've done it; you've written that screenplay, that story, that novel. You're always going to be "writing" but now, also, you've "written". There are so many more things I sort of wish I knew before I began, but in truth I really couldn't know. Not until I knew from doing. Although there is one thing I wish I had believed before I began writing. One thing that might have made a difference for me is: Be friends with other artists. Ideally, with other writers. There is so much they can do for you! They can understand without it needing to be said. They can pull you out of that vulnerable, lonely place that writing often leads us to. They can suggest publications and tell you what to expect. And you can do all of that for them, giving you the ever-valuable feeling of knowing you are valuable. 



Autism Answer (What I Wish I Had Known): 
 
Well, this is the thing, isn't it? I just shared the truth that my mom told and showed and exampled for me so many things about parenting, autism, differences, and disability. Yet, until I began parenting, I couldn't quite know it for myself. I had been taught that people aren't only about their uniqueness or their ability to fit in; there is a necessary relationship between the two. Yet until I began parenting my own four sons with challenges and differences, until I was diving deep into the waters of wanting them to be who they are while wanting to show them how to be part of the world, I couldn't quite grasp the truth of it. It had been said to me that different parents can parent well in different ways and for different reasons. But I had to be a parent myself, I had to struggle through the need to do it "right" only to discover that I had to do it my way, and differently even day to day, situation to situation, child to child, with a consistency that remained always at the base of things, before I could grasp and know the validity of different parenting styles. I had been told and shown that one day I would have to let go. I had seen my mom let my brothers move away, gently pushing some of them and promising them they were ready. I was there, helping and scared, as they practiced their skills and grew their abilities in the outside world. I saw as mom loved them while they failed and while they succeeded. Yet it wasn't until my own sons grew older and I had to begin the process of letting go that I truly understood. You are never not parenting, but you have to believe that they are able to become who they were meant to be without you, too. Indeed, they must. It is the only way. And, as with writing, I think it is helpful to find a few friends who get it. Who have been there. Who can understand without words. I have those friends. They are few, but they are more than enough. They give me the gift of their understanding while asking me to do the same. 

Autism Answer: About Writing 

My brothers, my mother, my sons, my friends; autism has shown itself in a variety of ways in my life. So I have grown to see people in a variety of ways. Interestingly, it has helped me shed the desire for labels. The variety is just too much. Outliers are my world and though they do fit into groups in a lot of ways (which can be a wonderful way to be understood) they don't fit only into specific spaces and can't be filed under restrictive labels. In this way my writing had been blessed. I don't feel a need to be an autism blogger or a fiction writer or an opinion peddler. I write to explore and share my authentic self while I keep the audience in mind. My mom taught my brothers to be themselves while caring about the world. I ask my sons (and myself) to do the same. But because autism has made so much of that harder and even painful, I've opened myself up to see that caring about the world often means showing it how it can change. Giving it stories that will ask it to shift. 

I don't always do this well - as a sibling, parent, or writer - but I hope always to be brave enough to do it. 

Hugs, smiles, and love!!
Autism Answers with Tsara Shelton (Facebook)

 ________________________________________________
RANDOM: My book, Spinning in Circles and Learning from Myself: A Collection of Stories that Slowly Grow Up, is not one of those novels I dream of writing. Instead it's a collection of mostly true stories, a book that was an important step for me. I needed to have a book published to push myself past the fear of my first book being published. I'm now working on my first novel. With excitement and far less fear, largely because it isn't going to be my first book!

Autism Answer: Get Out Daily - Another November Challenge

Out to dinner. #GetOutDaily

November. It's got No Shave November (Grow Cancer Awareness) and NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month). 

Let's take that can-do spirit (or "don't do spirit" I suppose in the case of not shaving!) and add Get Out Daily Month. 

I've said it before (like, a lot!) and I'll say it again: The world can't get to know or grow comfortable with our diversity, and our diversity can't grow comfortable with the world, if we don't go out. 

Yes, it is sometimes challenging. Yes, it means going out in a world that has been largely built for and built by folks without disabilities or differences (and, often, folks who are trying hard to hide their disabilities or differences). But where is the motivation for anyone to change that if we stay home? 

I'm the first to admit that sometimes I just don't wanna do it. Sometimes I just wanna stay home with my mixed race relationship and my cheek squishing son and my brings her own containers self. Sometimes I don't want to see everyone stare or roll their eyes or whisper about us to each other. 

I'm the first to admit that sometimes I do stay home. 

But most of the time (now, not in my younger years) I go out. I do it for me, and I do it for you. I'm entirely aware that if you were going out more, and if so many of us were going out more, we wouldn't feel so isolated and alone. We wouldn't feel such a strong burden to represent well for our communities and families. 

So, yes, I admit that it's a bit of a challenge. But nothing compared to those who have gone

On our way to an auto parts junk yard. #GetOutDaily

out before us!! Nothing compared to the brave people who fought for civil rights in recent history. School was segregated for my husband until he was in eleventh grade. My husband spent his youth allowed to enter only the back door of restaurants because of the color of his skin. In his first several jobs he was expected to show up early and leave late while he made far less money than his white coworkers, who easily and often blamed him for their mistakes. This was in my husbands youth! Not some long ago time only in the movies, friends. 

Things change because we show up. Because we show ourselves and say what we need. Over and over and over and over. 

So, to those who are challenging themselves with No Shave November, I promise to cheer you on! Folks who are taking on NaNoWriMo, I salute you! (Also, my son and I are joining you!)

Let's also Get Out Daily! Post pictures, videos, status updates if you'd like. Use a #GetOutDaily hashtag (I just made that up, feel free to come up with something catchier!) or just talk about it with family and friends. 

Hold hands with your trans lover in the park, stim in the store with your autistic father, roll with your friend in her wheelchair to the post office, eat at your favorite restaurant with your mixed race family, take your Tourette's Syndrome self out for a spa day. Let's get out! Daily!

ADVANCED GET OUT DAILY SUGGESTION: Don't only go to the safe spaces where they know you. Adventure! Explore! 

If we do this, an added bonus for us will be that when people ask what we need, what would make things a little more accessible, we'll have better answers. It's hard to have specific suggestions when we are in avoidance mode. 

Good luck and have fun!
I'll see you out there!

Hugs, smiles, and love!!!
Autism Answers with Tsara Shelton (Facebook)

At the bowling ally! #GetOutDaily

 

Autism Answer: Say YES! Then Find Your Way To Make It Happen

Okay, this is cool!!

My mom (international autism & parenting expert Lynette Louise aka The Brain Broad ) often tells me how much she loves her families. <----- That's what she calls her "clients". 

Although she can't tell me much about them (confidentiality and all that jazz) I feel as though they are my family, too. After all, the love and learning mom gets from and gives to them, she brings home to us. So, they are certainly my brothers and sisters! 

Often mom will talk passionately and with awe about the creative ideas her families come up with to hire her. Several families pitching in, or tying it in with a family vacation, or saving on travel by hiring her when she's in the area, or agreeing to be on camera for her international series FIX IT IN FIVE with THE BRAIN BROAD. A series that has, by the way, brought her more families! 

So when I ran across this Go Fund Me campaign created by Tamis Baron, a woman in California who is having my mom do a workshop in her home, I fell in love with yet another sister! She is hoping to help her nearly 90 year old dad and other family members, and also to give the gift of my mom to her community. From the campaign description: 

"He was diagnosed first with schizophrenia in his 50s and then rediagnosed with ADHD in his 60s. At 87 they were hell bent on diagnosing him with Dementia. I lived with him for a while the last 2 years and my experience was that, although he was slow in thinking and had short term memory issues, he acted more like people I knew who were Autistic. So I went on a quest for answers looking for something that fit."

This is a brilliant woman who knew she wanted to do the In Home Parenting Program, knew it was going to help a heap of people in her family and community, and knew it would be the most fun way to learn. So, she said YES and booked it! Now, she's finding her way to make it happen. 

Read More Here: Autism ASD Speaker and Workshop

*If you live in California, specifically around Sonoma County, you can also attend the workshop!*

Please have a peek at the campaign and share it with your social network. Of course, it would be wonderful if you could contribute. But even more than that I want to share with you a community of people who say YES and then make it happen.  

And I love it most of all when what they say YES to is the love, play, and neurofeedback that my mom brings to families around the world!!! 

Tamis has also created this Facebook Page, Autism ASD Speaker and Workshop, so folks can learn more about the event, choose to attend, ask questions, and chat about what they learn. It's a public page so head on over and LIKE it!

This is one small and important example of how every one of us can say YES to the things our guts and souls tell us we want/need, and then find creative ways to make those things happen. My mom did it for us kids all of our lives and we have grown happy and successful because of it. Despite every single thing in our lives seeming to say NO my mom knew when to say YES anyway, and then make it happen. 

I love watching other people do that too! 

 Hugs, smiles, and love!!
Autism Answers with Tsara Shelton (Facebook) 

 Check out this video Tamis (the event creator) made of her dad - who was diagnosed with Asperger's two years ago. And then consider contributing to the event. Perhaps you can even meet Tamis and her dad at the event by attending it yourself! 

Autism Answer: On My Brother's Birthday He Is Your Gift

Dar

Today my brother, Dar, turns thirty-five!! 

For over a million reasons my life is better because of Dar. For over a million reasons your life can be better because of Dar! 

My mom was drawn to him and adopted him when he was only three. "He's blind and deaf, he's a feral child, he'll go to the institution when there's room for him," they said. 

I stood quietly watching the small skinny boy run around our house and make strange noises. Then I turned my ten year old gaze on my mom and watched her watch him with love, curiosity, and something different - understanding. She seemed to know what he was saying and doing when it seemed clear to me that he wasn't saying or doing anything. 

I was wrong. Dar was saying too much at once and no one but mom could help him communicate it. 

Mom was right. Mom fought to keep him and to prove his value to himself and to the world. 

The Universe brought them together at first, for them. 

Me and Dar

And then it was for me and my siblings, siblings who grew in numbers and who learned to listen and help

each other.

And then it was for you. Because now my mom and brother know how to tell you important things. Tell you, show you, sing it for you, make it deep and emotive, funny and entertaining. 

Together they are telling us all the things we want and need to know. 

Happy birthday, Dar!!!
I love you more!!! 
Autism Answers with Tsara Shelton (Facebook) 

Visit my mom's websites for much more on how their story helps folks like you and me! 
www.lynettelouise.com / www.brainbody.net 

VIDEO: This music video for my mom's song "Unfinished" stars Dar in the role of himself. This might be the greatest way to celebrate Dar's birthday. Music and my mom are his favorite things! Bonus points if we watch it while eating a stick of butter! tee hee! (Dar really loves butter!!)

Autism Answer: Let's Keep The Conversation Going

I've been an obnoxious fan of Jon Stewart and The Daily Show for quite a long time now. I've adored the attention and fundraising Jon brings to veterans and autism for years, and loved the way he brings laughter coupled with strong resolve to issues he cares about for a long, long time. 

Interestingly, now that he's retired and no longer going to host The Daily Show, he's more popular than ever! Quotes and videos of his are flooding the internet and airwaves. Because of this there are thousands of new people learning to love him (as millions of us have been doing for years).

I'm reminded, then, to continue creating, loving, believing, speaking, discovering and teaching with my world. I'm reminded that the loops and lessons and truths of life are forever there and always available, and as I seek them out and share them with friends it's not the size of our audiences or thundering of applause that legitimizes us or our message. 

Jon Stewart has a gargantuan audience and it only seems to be growing now that he's off our screens and hanging with his family. Very soon, though, it'll quiet down.

But the stuff he helped us celebrate, the laughter and the desire to continuously grow kinder and smarter, that isn't going anywhere. Different faces and voices will always help us learn to think outside the box, as they always have. 

We, too, are those voices and faces, my friends. We parents and children and neighbors and bloggers and book buyers and selfie takers have no less an important audience than Jon Stewart. 

The world is shifted by what we choose to celebrate and how we tell our stories. And our stories, what we write and how we teach and what we do, will be here long after we've walked away from the microphone. 

Many of us celebrated Jon Stewart because he brought laughter and diversity and storytelling into our homes. These are beautiful things to celebrate! 

So, let's keep celebrating! Let's keep celebrating and creating and audience-ing and discovering! Let's keep truth seeking and laughing and honoring diversity!

Life is kind of like a long intimate conversation with close family and friends. 

As Jon suggested in his final episode,
let's keep the conversation going.

Hugs, smiles, and love!!
Autism Answers with Tsara Shelton (Facebook) 

Autism Answer: Happy Birthday Brain Broad! (an Autism Awareness Day Party!)

I invite you, I encourage you, to have a peek at my mom's websites. Inspiration, information, videos, blog posts, ideas, honest struggles and honest answers await you there! Go on over and have some fun. That's the greatest birthday party we can throw for my mom, Lynette Louise, The Brain Broad!!!! www.lynettelouise.com www.brainbody.net
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Happy birthday to Lynette Louise aka The Brain Broad!!!!

My mom's birthday is April 2nd, World Autism Awareness Day. 

My mom, The Brain Broad, and us kids!

That's, quite simply, the universe telling us to have a listen to what my mom has to say. My mom, who travels the world playing with and guiding families of autism toward happiness, health, and skill building. My mom, who legally adopted plenty of autistic folks and in her heart adopted hundreds more. My mom, who kindly encouraged me (and everyone she's ever met) to stop feeling sorry for or afraid of or bothered by autism and to instead learn with it and love helping and believe in the value of knowing people who see and feel and communicate differently, and who have to work hard to do so. 

To know and believe deep down that we are all equal and able and beautiful and fun.

My mom, who insists on always being authentic and kind while traveling the globe with cameras and love and a big colorful brain, so she can SHOW us how she does it and she can teach us how to do it ourselves. My mom, who loves us too much to stop working and teaching, but who really would like to just hang around with family learning trapeze and sipping coffee. 

Happy birthday Brain Broad!!!!!

We love you so much!

Go ahead and take the day off. Sip coffee and hang out with family. I'll wear my ‪#‎fixitinfive‬ shirt, and run around the world pointing them in your direction. Take a moment to breathe and live. 

Enjoy your day with Rye.

The kind of day all of the other professionals warned you'd never get to have--he works, saved up money, bought his own plane ticket, drove himself to the airport, parked his own car he pays for, and flew to visit his mom on her birthday--and know that you helped make that happen. YOU, my mom, The Brain Broad!

And then when Rye goes home--we'll be here still. Ready to learn from you again. 

Happy Birthday mom!!!!!
I love you so much!!!!
Hugs, smiles, and love!!
Autism Answers with Tsara Shelton (Facebook)

My mom, The Brain Broad, with my niece. This is what mom teaches!

Me, proudly wearing my FIX IT IN FIVE with THE BRAIN BROAD shirt!

"Fix it in five, because life is a series of choices." ~Lynette Louise aka THE BRAIN BROAD!

Autism Answer: Trigger Control

I read a fantastic blog post by Caitlin Kelly. In Everything's a Trigger on her Broadside Blog, she mentions "re-branding" our triggers. More specifically, she shares a romantic story of being proposed to by her current husband at a place and time to specifically re-brand her trigger. It's sweet, and it worked!

She encouraged us, her fans and followers, to share our own experiences with triggers and I excitedly shared one of my own successful trigger "re-brands". My comment:

"The movie Little Shop of Horrors with Rick Moranis was a trigger for me. When I was twelve my step-dad had been molesting me. That was hard. However, the soul shattering fear I felt in the exact moment that I told my mom, said the words out loud, was harder. And that movie (a family favorite, at the time) was playing in the adjoining room when I told. The moments following the telling were challenging, and putting the pieces back together proved to be a lot of worthwhile work, but nothing compares to the feeling in the moment I admitted that what was happening was real, and was everyone’s problem. 

But I’ve re-branded the movie by renting it, watching it often, and singing the songs with my sons. The re-branding worked beautifully because being with my boys always makes me feel strong and put together, and watching them point out different favorite parts than the ones my sister and I had adored, encouraged me to see the movie with entirely new eyes!
You have a lovely husband, Caitlin. How wonderful of him to help you re-brand a trigger so romantically!! Hugs!!!" ~~~

Yes, even when I'm hanging out on the web with other friends I use too many exclamation points. They're such fun!!!

Anyway, it got me reflecting. 

In the world of autism we are surrounded and abused by triggers! Sensory issues, communication challenges and so much more make many of us almost like a walking/running/rolling upcoming disaster. The most common and expected things out in the world beyond our personally renovated and decorated homes can trigger us, or our loved ones, to meltdown or retreat or have anxiety attacks.

But we've also learned that we are responsible for controlling our own triggers. When my brother couldn't hold back from huffing and hitting at the site of knees and elbows, my mom didn't campaign for the world to stop having knees and elbows, or for them to always wear long sleeves and thick pants and NEVER bend in my brother's direction. Instead she was understanding and kind to my brother, while finding a way to help him take control and re-brand that trigger. It took years, but it was worth it.

I can't expect the world to know not to play a song or quote a line from Little Shop of Horrors when I'm around (in fact, today at our town's Parkfest I clapped my hands and cheered as a group of itty-bitty girls performed a dance to the opening number from that movie!) but I could ask my family and friends to understand when hearing it made me go pale and my lips become numb. I could explain and expect understanding when my voice grew small and my world became out of focus.

And I could take control of my trigger by finding a new way and new reason to watch the movie. And I did! And now I love it!!

Yet, in truth, I still fight the initial tummy tumble and shrinking of myself, but it's so short and almost unnoticeable that I can't honestly call it a trigger anymore. It's just something of a memory that I will likely always have. That's okay!

So go ahead and control your triggers! Show and teach your children that they can too! Don't expect it to be quick, and don't ever belittle the very real reaction they are having to the trigger, but encourage and believe they can re-brand!!

Happy Saturday friends!
And now, "It's super tiiii-iiime. Come on, come on..... " 

Hugs, smiles, and love!!!

Autism Answers with Tsara Shelton (Facebook)

Autism Answer: Keeping And Teaching A Healthy Kind Of Crazy!

Lynette Louise aka THE BRAIN BROAD... her crazy ideas have helped heal thousands of families around the world!!

My mom, Lynette Louise, grew up with an unbalanced brain and received a few temporary diagnosis off and on throughout her life. Friends sometimes just called her "Crazy Lynette!"... her out of the box ideas gifted them with fantastic and creative games to play, and quickly revealed her global vision and leadership qualities. 

Eventually she would adopt four crazy boys, and get custody of two crazy teenage girls, to the thrill of me and my sister, her two crazy biological daughters! And together our family went from Crazy to Sane--which also happens to be the title of my mom's one woman musical comedy show. 

Ya. She teaches brain science and mental health answers with comedy and music. Crazy, huh?!

Why yes! It's the right kind of crazy! The fantastic and helpful kind!

The brilliant thing is, as mom went from crazy to sane, she brought her out of the box thinking and crazy belief in the value of disabled and mentally ill people with her. In other words, she held onto the right kind of crazy! 

Now she travels the globe as a mental health and parenting expert and teaches families her unique blend of play therapy, neurofeedback, and family dynamics counseling... because she has the crazy idea that her clients should become their own experts and learn to not need her anymore!! 

Growing up our family adopted this theme song,"Boom boom ain't it great to be--crazy! Boom boom ain't it great to be--crazy! Giddy and foolish all day long, boom boom ain't it great to be--crazy!?" This was an important attitude. Because it reminded us to appreciate the great in our crazy, while encouraging us to keep it light and positive. It gave us the desire to celebrate our uniqueness, while mom consistently exampled the value of marrying that comfort with intention and kindness. 

It was the crazy in mom, and the crazy in us, that gave us the audacity to believe we could be happy, smart, individual, and successful. And when our crazy was the kind that hurt, confused, or scared us... we were just crazy enough to believe we had the power and ability to change that. So, we did!!

My mom has a talent for sharing a healthy kind of crazy while healing uncomfortable and unbalanced brains. 

Celebrate the crazy in your life too. The world needs a little more originality and a lot less trying to fit into some mold made for somebody else. 

Hugs, smiles, and love!!!!
Autism Answers with Tsara Shelton (Facebook)

Autism Answer: More Than A Supermom!

~~Today is World Autism Awareness day, and it's also my mom's birthday. Since my mom is international mental health and autism specialist Lynette Louise aka THE BRAIN BROAD, I thought it would be perfectly pertinent to share a little bit about her, and her gift giving nature, here. Happy birthday mom!!!!~~

My mom, Lynette Louise aka THE BRAIN BROAD, is a woman who gives a lot! She travels the world to help families, writes shows and performs on her own dime for people who need what she knows, educates and certifies in order to stay relevant and helpful, invites struggling people to live with her and offers them ways to discover their path again, takes care of all eight of us kids, and then finds creative ways to help her grand-kids.... the list is endless!

When talking about mom I never know where to begin. She adopted my four brothers, all of them with special needs, and loved them until they learned to love themselves. She fought for legal custody of two of my sisters, who came from abuse and had other challenges, and loved them until they discovered themselves. Her two biological children (a sister and I) were always involved in the decisions and invitations of siblings. All eight of us were loved equally, and without ever knowing how hard it was for mom.

Mom's attempts at marriage couldn't handle us. Schools didn't believe in my brothers though mom begged and fought for them to do so. The abusive families of my new sisters fought to drag my mom's name through the dirt in order to keep their own names free of deserved inspection. Money was nearly impossible to make when children as needy as mom's were being sent home from schools and camps that couldn't see the beauty of us. 

But mom never, ever, let us see that we were difficult. Always we were her reason, her light, her everything. And life felt fun while we always felt supported. 

Now, my mom is an international mental health practitioner and so much more. Everything she knows she shares with parents around the globe via books, therapy, her podcast, an international reality series (FIX IT IN FIVE with THE BRAIN BROAD, airing on The Autism Channel) and more. But her sharing, hard work, and non-stop efforts continue to be for us; her children. 

She gifts tirelessly of herself in order to shift the attitude of a world that her children live in. In order to keep learning and discovering answers for my one remaining autistic brother--her slow moving miracle. Regardless of where mom is or what she's doing, it's for family. 

It's because as deep as you go in her soul, she's a mom. 

And because my mom loves and feels connected to the world we live in, that means we're all her family. Leaving her with a lot of giving to do!!!

Happy Birthday mom!!!

Happy Autism Awareness Day World!

World Autism Awareness Day 
Exhibit A
Loving, accepting, and discovering ideas together.
It looks like this!

Hugs, smiles, and love!!!

Autism Answers with Tsara Shelton (Facebook)

Autism Answer: Unmasking Under-Man!!!

Who is Under-Man? He is my brother, Dar, and he is one heck of a superhero!!

A thirty-one year old, newly verbal lowish functioning autistic man. His superhero name? Under-Man!! His superpower? Taking every item in the house and tucking it under... anything! The couch, the beds, the tables and dressers... can't find the car keys? Look under! 

Guess what else has been tucked under. A life of convenience and simplicity. Oh, we have those days, certainly, and they are lovely! But thanks to my brother and his superpower (which we have chosen to use for good) there is no need for a life where things stay where we put them or lessons are learned the first time around. 

And as with every superhero, my brother has gifted the lives of many, frightened a few, and angered some, while struggling with his own superpower. And like only the luckiest superheroes, my brother is surrounded by those who know and love him entirely, and who will walk to the ends of the earth and back to help him feel comfortable in his skin, so he can just be Dar. Saving lives and living happy by being himself, comfortably!

Hugs, smiles and love my fellow superhero sidekicks and helpers!!!
Autism Answers with Tsara Shelton (Facebook)
xoxoxo

It's a brother! It's a son! It's a friend! It's a bowling buddy! No, wait....it's Under-Man!!
Ummm...and all of those other things, plus a lot more!! xoxo